Monday, September 13, 2010

=) OR =(

I don't know how to start this post but here goes...

Liking you for such a long time and I still do. Isn't that weird? I don't think so. Think its just REAL. I know we will NEVER be together. You'll never give me THE CHANCE. If I were to see it in another point of view, maybe you value our friendship too much that you're afraid the slightest mistake will make us feel awkward to even be friends. I'm not too sure about that. Funny thing is, we think alike, we have those same old dirty jokes, gestures, our bitchiness is kinda the same (ok, sometimes we overpower each other) and we kinda know what the other is going to say next. Then again, is it we know each other too well that it's impossible? Or is it I'm not up to your standard? I don't know. I enjoy hanging out with you, going out with you. I feel very comfortable and I get to be myself, no need to hide anything because we are 2 of a kind. I am overjoyed everything that I get to go out with you. Everytime you ask me out, I'm thrilled.

Today you said I'm your best friend. Not directly but during our conversation about someone else. I was so happy and touched you said I'm your best friend. I know you won't risk losing this friendship here. You told me you enjoy hanging with me too. I'm happy you are. Though I can't help but to think, what if we were together? We are like best of friends, we know each other well. Wouldn't it be great and explosive? But then again, it could be my imagination only. I know by the end of the day no matter what, its still a NO. I admit, I feel uneasy when you take in others' invitation. Or when you said that or this person not bad and you'd go for him. Maybe I screwed up my first impression on you a year ago. At least I'm having you beside me as a good friend/best friend. Its better than you're not in my life at all. I'm just grateful that I still have you. I know there won't be any chance for me. I'll have to see you with someone else. I enjoy your company and every shit you talk to me...


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